RELATIONS PUBLIQUES..

The Dictionary sort of definition for Public Relations is that,its an area of expertise which has,enhancing something or someone's reputation and showing it in best light,as its main goal.Its basically a reputation protector or a face saver or something like that.


In today's world,the line that the demarcates "good" and "made to look good" is so fine..That FINE has to have a new fine word to define itself.Well,if i'm still unclear as to the point i'm trying to make then this is what it is..when you see the most beautiful-exactly-what-you-needed-bang-on advertisement of a product,is that what you get when you buy that thing that you saw? Or is it not quite what you saw?Is the PR industry projecting it way better than the production industry or packaging industry or whatever industry which is actually making it?!?


Yes Ladies and Gentlemen....Welcome to the World of Faux Par Excellence !!


There's a story behind this story.
This tale runs in retrospective mode and the pieces fit in as realization dawns upon me.Up until a few months i was with two friends who started dating a few years back and became one of those stick-to-each-other 24*7 couple!It was the perfect picture and they were so crazy about each other that,EVEN "crazy" forgot its limits when it came to them.They finished each other's sentences,food,work..to (YOU NAME IT!)from waking up in the morning or taking an exam,it was confusing to the layman's eyes as to what was whose responsibility.The line of demarcation had become so fuzzy between the two individuals that for us,it was a matter of great feat that we were able to tell them apart!For them.."WE" had not only replaced "I"(like most normal couples) but the whole alphabet range when they were together.


So? What was the point of concern in this lovebirds' story? I.
(DISCLAIMER: And i speak only for myself here,not for all of "us" related to them.)
Well,it so happened that I was(at least in my head and very very sincerely from my side)pretty close to them both.As a result of which,when the glass shattered and their bitter-est break up happened,the likes of yours truly was squished on more than one occasions and so i was one of the people who struggled and juggled to strike a balance to maintain my relationship with both of them.THAT'S WHEN IT BECAME CRYSTAL CLEAR!
In the course of all the struggling and juggling,i realized how i never had a relationship with the "both" of them.It wasn't the both of them who remembered my birthday.It wasn't the both of them lending me a shoulder when i needed the most.It wasn't the both of them worried about my health.It wasn't the both of them who loved me the way i was made to believe...It wasn't the both of them Blah Blah and Blah.It wasn't the both of them EVER in anything.


It was in fact one of them,making the other one look good.


*CRASH LANDING*
It was always one of them handling the PR for the other at all times,making not only that person an angel but also making people like me,feel like utter fools on our happy-realization-day!
Suddenly your take on all the previous events changes..all your happy memories with your favorite people become blotchy flabbergasting revelations with someone who didn't even care an iota bit.
Blame it on the PR-par excellence?Or the PR Manager? Or your exceptionally blindfolded judgement?
Well.I'm definitely not one to answer THAT after being crowned the fool here.But what i did know in the end was that.. who was and who wasn't the one in bad light.Who had a good intention there and who didn't care genuinely became much more easy to fathom..


As for the storytelling.Yes,this is it.The story behind this story.
My thought bubbles from my retrospective realization. 
What if you are being PR-ed?
Are you so naive that you don't realise that you're being projected as something that you're not?And is it fair on the person being targeted with all the PR skills?


Life's not a job interview.And it shouldn't be treated like one too..calculating,weighing options,making perfect flawless impressions and earning all brownie points for,lets face it,something you really aren't.
Watching each other's backs is one thing..and *CRASH LANDING* a whole another thing.
Bottomline:If you need to be PR-ed (c'mon is someone still bluffing themselves out there? there's not an iota of a chance in the world that you're a full grown person and you don't know that you're being "made" to look good!except if you're a toddler whose parents are lying to dupe the school authorities into taking you in!) 


Sooooo,..if you need to be PR-ed..does that not speak volumes about you?Don't say the answer aloud.Not because the world doesn't need to know but because you don't need to tell the world yourself.Everything,my dear friend,sooner or later,speaketh for itself.


As for me,i still carry my fine bone china like relationships with them both.. precious,handle with supreme care and invaluable in their own ways. The only difference between the two china is that...one is constantly on tenterhooks for the fear of breaking ... and the other.. well the other stands secure,with pride of being one of the finest china in the world..always reassuring that it can never break.


All that i'm saying is that,if you have the eye,sooner or later,you'll be able to tell the faux fur from the Russian Barguzin sable!! You'll just be able to tell.

Empathetically Yours..

Empathy. 


It all starts when you have the ability to understand what the other person is feeling by stepping into that person's shoes and seeing the picture with his/her eyes. When your heart can feel what the other person's heart is feeling. But when does empathy take over and take a high jump to become something else,something so strong that you feel even when you shouldn't,that you understand even when you shouldn't and ..mustn't?


When you have the ability to understand how someone feels because you can imagine what it's like to be them, then,how do you decide when to stop feeling what the others are feeling when you're the butt of hurt in the situation?When the situation becomes unfair to you,is it still okay to understand the one being unfair to you?Does the world still expect you to understand??


Its only justified to NOT UNDERSTAND sometimes.And may be you shouldn't.Only to be fair to yourself..and Most importantly..To give the others a chance and see if they feel what you feel..if they understand that its not fair on you to empathize sometimes. 


Still.. feeling the way someone else feels is becoming a rarity by the moment.. And there's a lil thing called taking the high road.. and may be we all should(not at the cost of being a human being because its only human to not understand sometimes!)TRY and consider taking that before we jump to non-empathizing!

Empathetically Yours
Sea.

Aakhir Big Boss exactly kya chahatein hain ??

Well, THAT only Big Boss can answer!!

But what i do know is that....i'm shamelessly obsessed with the show's 4th season now.. and after all that Sara-Ali wedding nonsense and all the breaking news of every reality show being "fixed' and being pre planned AND of course Pamela on her surprise visit,making the boys go dry for all the silicone and the wannabe girls(Read: veena and sara) just the right shade of green..i still continue to contribute my bit to help the TRPs(of Colors TV and all the news channels showing those sensational analysis!!)reach sky high!! I'm feeling so many things about the ghastly turn that this show is taking, that i want to just DO something for real about it.This feeling is attributed to the fact that i get transported back in time when i watch that show..
..Big Boss seems such a familiar territory.I look at the people and every time i do..nostalgia gushes out from all corners of my brain and flood my mind.It brings back the good,bad,ugly,uglier,ugliest and THE BESTest memories of the past half decade..Yes,everyone there in the giant Big Boss crazy place with me would agree with me on this and find a counterpart for each participant with someone we know from there.Its Hilarious.And very very true.We loved and hated each other for we had nobody BUT each other in there.Everything then boils down to the most basic human instincts when you have your own Dollys,Pamelas,Saras,Manojs,Veenas...you name it!
But,at the end of it all,there is only one winner.Through all the aadesh of the Big Boss..through all the Karyas performed..through all the niyamon ka ulanghan..through all the badtameezi, pyar and ashleelta that goes on inside..there emerges only ONE winner..And as we've seen in the seasons before this and in our lives..THAT one person is one who has honestly and patiently tolerated most of the sh*t in the house.And that my friend is the secret of the trade,patience.Yes,it can kill some and save some. Rahul Roy(Season 1),Ashutosh Kaushik (Season 2) and Vindu Dara Singh(Season 3) were all an amalgamation of patience and ___ something.

Rahul Roy : Patience and Diplomacy
Ashutosh : Patience and Luck
Vindu :Patience and Conviction

We all,as i see it,are 100% capable of that and___something.The only differing level is that of patience till the last drop.
So. Aakhir Big Boss exactly kya chahtein hain?? Big Boss Big Patience chahtein hain!! In life as in the show,Big Boss probably requires only this one characteristic which it tests continuously.. and its no big surprise or secret of the unknown for the likes of me..who've experienced what the participants experience in real life.
Without sounding more like a preacher and an enlightened soul.. I think(and you will too when you wise up!!hehe ) Patience trumps everything else in the world. And as Phoebe randomly once said to Joey to sound wise that ....Patience is the road to understanding,which is the key to a happy heart. 

I love happy hearts.I'm the biggest fan of happy hearts ever.And if that's what it takes.Then so be it..I know its not a cake walk.. but what the hell ! i'm not one to settle for less than a happy heart either ! Are you ?? 

Anybody home????

When i write it automatically makes me think whether i'm just rambling away to the universe or something OR is someone out there who is actually listening to what i have to say..In the exact way that I say it. When i follow other people and listen to what they have to say about something that intrigues me, I wonder whether someone follows me anonymously and find me intriguing perhaps?I know its perfectly human and expected for anyone to think this way..But then on second thoughts i just shrug the possibility because,lets face it,I'm no Jane Austen or Chetan Bhagat or Shobhaa De or Nigella Lawson or Amitabh Bachchan or the likes.I'm just a regular person who is here to do what everyone here does..pen everything down. And Just Write. whatever i feel like or don't feel like or what i'd want to feel like.. i just write it down.

Its comforting to know that i have my space.. a forum.. a stand of my own to just send to the world whatever i have to say without having to actually sit and talk or go lecture or write a book or anything that's more cumbersome or time consuming  than..blogging.

But then right after ensuring that one makes full use of this wonderful forum one cannot help but wonder whether there's someone who's actually listening to whatever is being said?!? I and the likes of me(and i know it for sure that there are a million trillion gazillion of them around the globe) go on and on and on.. and then suddenly we stop and think..hey!! anybody home?? are you listening to me or i'm just talking ..??

Lets admit.. its not only with respect to writing.Its with respect to everything and everyone in life..Don't we all wonder right after we've poured our hearts out,whether or not there's someone listening to us?Following what we have to say?Understanding us? And may be seeing things the way we see them? But the thing is.. Apart from this doubt,i know something for a fact.I might not know who is listening to me or following me so i know them.. but what i do know is that.. SOMEONE IS LISTENING to me. Yes. I say this with immense experience and a 1000% surety that whenever a person says something (i'm not sure whether someone somewhere's made for you!! BUT..) i do know that someone somewhere's listening to you.Just the way you are.We all are.Consciously,Sub consciously or Unconsciously.

So if you're reading this today and if you've ever thought that what you say is falling on deaf ears..rest assured..Its not.It never has.And it never will. :)

The Power Packed Sabbatical !!

Previously on Silver Potpourri....

There was a whole lot going on on Silver Potpourri before this much deserved and well utilized hiatus!Well ..u got a sneak peak into my life.. in many ways some direct and some-not so direct.Things that mattered and things that absolutely mattered.And the reason i got "d/c-ed" ? Ah. That happened not because nothing was happening in my life but because too much was happening all around me to be able to absorb and reflect on.

I had been waiting since the last post for a day like today to come. When my laptop's charged to the max.,when there are absolutely no workers in the house,when the weather's perfection,when i can just sit by myself and be back here..with an outburst to be poured  :)

So..too much has happened since Code Silver..20.10.20 10 !
For starters, the whole CWG fiasco had started fading ..only to leave behind a corrupt trail of officials and unscrupulous authorities being investigated and probed.Writer and a crazy person Arundhati Roy did what she does best.. Make controversial statements about everything under the sun and then in an attempt to justify her stance only worsens the situation.. The "keeps" of the country united had their 15 minutes of fame in bid to have alimony rights from their beaus making live-ins an option less convenient and more accountable.. Unveiled also,was a certain rather lousy CM of a state who got into a grand-scam of a co-operative society apartments allotted to all the whos-who this man knew..Then. Obama  came and Obama went. With him came the coolest,most chic,most intelligent,most normal First Lady E-V-E-R Michelle Obama and a personal army to take care off..well EverythinG from the word go..and then there was the most adorable dance.. the non-committal question answer session.. breaking of protocol by the same old lousy CM ..capped by the hosting of the most lavish most sophisticated "Awadhi" Gala at the PM's Residence..One of our main festivals, Diwali happened too during this hiatus.. with all its purifying characteristics.. it came with all the lights,crackers,(pollution!),sweets,decoration,cards and prosperity for one and all.On a more personal front, the house..1/2 of it is successfully painted and maintained!*tears of joy* with the other half just about to start..*shudders at the thought of the rigmarole*   and then of course,the dreadful accident..and then 3 more till now .. happened !! The mob..the smashing of the car..the shock after. I'm just thankful to God i survived the ghastly inhuman act.Really. Survived. We're just thankful to God,that all through it none of the family members got hurt..probably the stars aren't in our favor..or wait..are they in our favor,more than ever,for saving us each and every time? Optimism is the best to be practiced at such times.. And with that leap of faith.. Now more than ever..i'm feeling stronger and better.. ready to work ! Yes,time to fly away from the beloved nest.. and start working.. more on that beginning as and when it happens . :)

And..i've been busy with a lot lately and today's our transition day when we shift into the other half of our house and empty the one to be done now..so i thought why not today!?..lets tell you..whoever you are..how i have been during my sabbatical..my power packed sabbatical! :)

Tell me if you will.. how you have been?? :)

Code:Silver. (Part I)

• THE things that matter dont necessarily come in big huge shiny luxurious boxes.. They come more than often in small packages,in tiny insignificant little gestures,in chote recharges..They are those tiny little simple codes that open the treasures and more often than not,also the Pandora's boxes!This is about the things that i dont probably even accept myself at times,because may be i cant do much about them as in dark dingy corners of our inner selves lie our fears,our immaturities,our inhibitions,our apprehensions,our denials,our premonitions,our disbeliefs and all the bloopers a man can think off !!basically all the doppleganger instincts exist somehow inside all of us and are manifested in some form or the other. Boisterously or secretly they just do.SO,when i look into the mirror and see the red horns instead of the halo,its usually the denial in me,which is responsible for the change! Denial ,(as i stop denying now and realise),is in most respects my counter character.

I realised that i'm clingy about things,refusing to let go,choosing not to do things,looking away when reality stares back and conveniently turning a blind eye to things that ..end or are about to end or just..can end.Weird but true.A simple ending of anything i kile.. ending a book.. the end of a series on TV.. end of the festive season..any season for that matter.. end of studies.. end of holidays.. end of a journey.. end of relationships.. end of you-name-it!
Yes.I deny endings.
It dawned on me this exquisite quality of denying an end ,when after watching each and every episode at least a 6million times in all permutations and combinations.math could offer,of F.R.I.E.N.D.S, with and without my friends for years now,i had successfully dodged watching the one after The One with All The Ones ie. The Last One. Up until,a few weeks back,when something came over me and i took a big bulky decision of mustering all the courage to watch the end of  something that i had literally lived by and loved every bit of it like my own!I teared up and choked from the beginning to the end of the episode and for some days after that.But then i thought that it was just a soap.Its not like its going somewhere..physically.But was it really only that ?? was i only clingy to things physically proximate?Think Not.Even if it was a virtual end.It was an end nonetheless.And may be its a problem which takes care of itself with the help of the healing-time.But there it is,escaped and evaded victoriously till it comes and jumps out from the self-created-darkness.
No.I'm not proud of it.I'm just helpless and hopeless and go down the dumps even thinking about it.AM I THE ONLY EMOTIONAL F***WIT ALIVE of course,after Madame Bridget Jones?Am i the only one who cant stand The End?Am i the only one for whom De-nial is not just a river in Egypt? Or all of us in our ways,develop the darkness around the things we choose not see??

• Moving onto more stupid charactersitics,species like yours truly,as researchers will definitely be able to prove one day not very far from now,do not have the anatomy of getting a complete one hundred percent Closure. Remember no one gets everything? Yes.We do not have the ability of getting over ANYTHING  completely ever.Its like we are at constant war with ourselves and refuse to give peace to our overly sensitive and emotional heads!Bordering on making ourselves almost like Masochists! ** shudders** Well. Upon regaining composure i think we're not Masochists.We're just vulnerable or ..at times,too touchy about something for too long to get closure from it. It sort of becomes a way of life,it becomes a thought stuck in our heads for so long that closure seems to be the hardest thing to do.And at other times,the less often ones,closure is what we don't even seek(despite knowing fully how important it is).Apart from my soliloquies,the only thing that comes to my mind and for which the nation has been apparently trying to get closure and move on is Ayodhya.I came across a very apt quote by someone that said Whether Lord Ram was actually "born"(unlike the other Gods who appeared from Above without a fixed birth place) or not is still a question and the courts have gone and decided the exact birth place of the God.

We clearly,subconsciously didn't want this sh*t to end.It had become a way of life for some truly useless people and now when the judiciary came together and came up with an apparently straight jacketed answer..people from all religions are in lurch as to the closure which they were forced to accept! 
SO,its the whole country,eh? closure seeking apparently and closure evading secretly!



More on the coded areas later..till then..Don't deny the closure,my friend.Do'nt. :)

Hedgehog's dilemma..is clearly not only hedgehogs' !!

The thing is,as i've tried stating very very categorically and strongly before,that in my world,INFIDELITY or even the slightest -most remote likes,spells crime.Its as wrong as wrong can be at its own worst-most ugly-unethical-wrong days! Period.


BUT.


There is always a freaking but! It got me thinking,this but,of course,when one of my own "persons" found himself trapped in a viscous cycle of unfaithfulness.It was like i was seeing one "Unfaithful" after the other..with three different stories.The only common link between all those stories being this smarty pants' character..In the first story that i witnessed he played the male equivalent of the CHEATER (yes,i do have the liberty to call him whatver i want bluntly!)ie. Passion-seeking wife (Diane Lane).Subsequently in the second situation and the one,fyi,which i know at the back of my hand,he was the the CHEATED(not literally though) ie.loving husband (Richard Gere) in the sense that he was mistaken in love(if i may call it!) to a certain extent.And now,in the present scenario,he is the unconnected-neither the suffer-or nor the suffer-ee,the "other man" the one being the cause of the whole plot,the French bookseller (Olivier Martinez) who is the third end of the triangle.


Well so the story today,is about this third guy who,as circumstantial as it was,was still in fact the one whose only connection to this infidel business was the infidel girl he was dreaming off.As fate could have it.. it came a full circle..and Karma struck back..only to bite him in his posterior.And The cheater became the cheated became the boy-next-door-who-just-happens-to-like-the-girl! Ok. So its happened. A slip or two. But now what,who is to be blamed now? Off the two(we're not counting the third poor cheated guy.He'll have his own fidelity issues to sort out.) testosterone and estrogen high characters?The one who knowingly is breaking the trust of an innocent guy and betraying him?Or the one who knows the drill,who has literally been there-done that-repented later and knows fully well the wrong-ness and unethical-ness of the whole deal the girl has to offer?Will be right to break the bond which has been nurtured and held for years for something that still just qualifies as a mere fling?Are the intensities even comparable?


The crassness and crystal clearness of the situation is but,scary.It looks like a never-ending cycle of so many things.How much so ever we might justify a wrong and prove the best intentions behind it,the wrong still does not cease to be a wrong.If you could get up one day and decide to walk out of a long committed relationship,shattering someone's illusion of living in a wonderful world.Someone could get up and do that to you.And if that cycle continues,do you think there will still be something left of ..FAITH?of Belief? of Trust?Is it worth it at all??To break THAT bond of the long committed relationship to step into THIS which barely qualifies to be a fling?What is the guarantee that this all-mushy-all rosy-all romantic fling will last,if that long&strong commitment filled mature one couldn't? If one starts depending upon only detachment to substitute all the human emotions in the world or take it as a solution to overcome all the adversities we go through or deal with any pain that anyone causes us.. then i must tell you that there will certainly come a day when we will know not where to go,either there'll be no space for us detached celibate stone-cold super-humans on the Himalayas or no room for any of us cruel deranged zombies in the mental asylums!


May be it is best after all,to stick to your guns and hold your ground while you still can.Call a wrong a wrong and deal with it as it is.Giving into temptation and blaming it on the hormones is the act of the weak for the only trip you go to after that is that of the Guilt-land ! May be,just may be,it is best then to make a stitch in time and save the nine or as the B-52s sang, you should probably nip it the bud or or or..or may be just let the complication solve itself  before you embark on your journey of the never never land with that "Unfaithful"-protagonist !Ask yourself a question or two..before rushing into it at god-speed.


Are u being taken for a ride?Or are you taking someone else for a ride?
Is it all about the short lived-fun filled-ride? Or about something more than just that?
Is this an affair to remember or a tale gone with the wind?
Is this the act of the wise or the otherwise?
Will this be love or fatal attraction?


How much so ever we might deny it or claim otherwise,physical and emotional fidelity go hand in hand,one cannot and will ever not exist without the other.Once the line is crossed in one,the other's bound to go out of the window at that very moment.Does anybody,in their right minds,begin a relationship by thinking of its end?Until of course,its an arrangement which is of that nature,which is bound to end,which comes with a convenient time limit and of course a very convenient attitude!If someone were to ask me and if i would be any of the three characters of  our movie-of-the-day "UNFAITHFUL", i would have the way out ready for me for i wouldn't need to justify or bargain or rational with myself on any front to make that call for myself,as deep down i'd just know,that,infidelity by any other name,would be as wrong.And if at all,it is given any other name.. its only merchandising and packaging the same product in a different more appeal-able fashion!

So when The Force above made us,he made sure that he puts in us all,those basic characteristics,irrespective of the fact whether we're a man or a woman or an animal. Owing to this we all face same problems and same dilemmas. 

The hedgehog's dilemma, or sometimes the porcupine dilemma, is an analogy about the challenges of human intimacy. It describes a situation in which a group of hedgehogs all seek to become close to one another in order to share their heat during cold weather. However, once accomplished, they cannot avoid hurting one another with their sharp quills. They must step away from one another. Though they all share the intention of a close reciprocal relationship, this may not occur for reasons which they cannot avoid!

When this is amply clear even to the hedgehogs,then why be it so difficult for us..humans to understand??Why can't we realize that if being with someone can be so harmful that it hurts our own self,then its best to take a step back!?! If   even the porcupines can step back..why can't we????

P(r)eaches and (S)cream.Year : 2030!!

Its like a rhythmic discharge of one's duties consciously,unconsciously and sub-consciously for ages together,in many different ways,at all given times.... Moms : Preach & Kids : Scream!

SO evidently enough,the preach show had begun and our smooth and sweet dessert like-phase of peaches and cream was sort of punctuated with occasional not-so-smooth-p(r)each(es) and (s)cream(s)!It was necessary at times to unleash the preachy-self i decided,to justify my mommy-ness and it was necessary the kids thought to unleash their  screamy-selves to justify  their kid-ness !
Nonetheless,the stories with morals,anecdotes from the past and the wisdom of ages(haha) kept flowing time and again to keep them on track.. but what i was about to tell them was a one self sufficient tale which had the bottomline,moral,teaching and preaching of all the other stories.. No,it wasn't the story of How I Met Their Father but it was a story leading up-to the story of how,i did in fact,meet him too later in life..

Kids,so it started in the monsoon of  the historic-all important-most memorable year 2010,on one fine morning,when your favorite Aunt Wormy asked me a question regarding the internship application she was filling out for THE FIRM of the country in our times.And i answered rather strongly by saying that i'm glad that i never went there to sell my soul to those losers!And she instantly replied "dont say that!" in your typical Aunt Wormy style.Her point being that everyone who went there,did so for a different reason.Which, i totally agreed with and that is when it hit me. The fact. How could i not see it before?? It was so clear looking at me in the face.How could i miss it?!

Kids as you already know,2010 was my year of transition,the year i crossed the finish-line of law school and was sent off to become a lawyer. A Very Real Lawyer. In the big bad Very Real World. Full of things to do and opportunities to be grabbed. And your Aunt Wormy still had two more years to go before she hit the finish line.When i was there,where she was,i did the exact same thing which she did,filled out the internship application(like everyone who goes to law school with you does!)to THE FIRM.There was one thing about THE FIRM, and the likes,which everyone knew.That is--it was a place meant for ultimate corporate-cut throat-workaholic-competitive-top notch-most high strung variety of people.It was bitter but true then and true even now.Still all we wanted,well most of us,was atleast one stint at THE FIRM.One internship to see how it was to be THERE.To feel what THEY  felt.And see if you fit in THERE.Knowing the truth it was not hard to imagine how you would be in a place like that.People with real mettle and of course,those up for all those qualities,got in there.When i filled out the application it felt like an ideal situation,I knew i wasn't cut for a place like THAT and i wasn't going to go there and work in the future but what the hell,IT was THE FIRM,THE opportunity,THE ideal-internship-way to be there and still not BE there..all in all,the math said it would be like..THE Experience.

So if 2008-me thought like that,what had happened to the 2010-me??What could 've possibly happened in only two years?? I was just the same person.And then.. It struck me like a bolt of lightning..  Two words Kids,the answer had only two words.. Time & Experience.


Yes,times had changed. And now that they had,the experiences that I would've wanted to have or could've had then,aren't the same that i would want to have now.I was on the other side and there was now no time to experiment with things which i was so sure i wasn't cut for,no loss situation i was in then was gone now,if i chose to work there now,i'd BE there.LIVE that life i dreaded.Have no life or time to even enjoy the oodles of moolah i was earning.But then again this choice was MINE. And only mine.Aunt Wormy still had two years to go before she would have to make a choice like me,between her experiences.And so does everyone ,at every stage and time of life.

Life is a sojourn of experiences but the tricky thing there is that,it is impossible for one human being to have in his/her one life,all the experiences of the world.And the non tricky,most simple and quite obvious and the BEST thing is that..Nobody even expects you to have a life which looks like a ridiculous menu card of ALL the experiences in the world! Thats when this silly choice making and stupid weighing options come into play.With times,priorities change,preferences change,circumstances change and with them change the experiences one can afford to have or are wise to have!Something which is the best sometime back might not even be the worst thing to do sometime later.It all happens with time.

There are a plethora of experiments and experiences in the world but they should be taken and done at just about the right time to make all the difference in one's life.Then again there are experiences which might be allowed to one by their religion or ethics or family tradition and not allowed to the others by  virtue of the same..like eating pork is prohibited by those that follow Islam or eating beef by those that practice Hinduism or eating anything non vegetarian by the Jains.These might be experiences for a person who is not a Muslim or a Hindu or a Jain but they are experiences nonetheless which aren't considered good by some,they might do it irrespective of knowing its prohibition for them but that is the choice that they make.There are experiences of a more personal than religious nature,that are more basic than staunch,more simple than any others,like those of getting the adrenalin rush by extreme sports,or doing those crazy fear factor stunts,eating worms and reptiles of all sorts,doing the man v.wild if given a chance.. they are experiences no doubt.But would you like to have them? yes,may be when you are 20 and looking for something absolutely crazy and adventurous and absurd to do..YES. but will that yes still be a yes when you hit 30 ? 40? 50? nada!

 The change from drinkers to teetotalers,from chain smokers to non smokers,from non vegetarians to vegans,from leading a copy book playboy style life to being celibate..Speaks of Change and choices one makes.Thats the change in choice,when you might want to do something that you absolutely couldn't think of doing when you were 20 and wanted to have those crazy experiences..One should not aim at doing or having everything for that would be the act of not the wise but of the otherwise! Choose your experiences and choose them right and most importantly at the right time so it gives you the maximum pleasure that it ought to.

Aunt Wormy was on that lucky stage of life when she could afford to have that experience and see if she fitted in but mom on the other hand was not looking at her one month stint anywhere anymore,she was looking at something more "her" and more interesting than a boring stereotypical corporate experience at that stage of her life!Time had passed when THAT could've been THE experience but now the time was for something less experimental..something more stable and something more suited to who I was.

So Kids,as you already know,in the winter that year,Aunt Wormy went on to experience her one month stint at THE FIRM,to see how things worked at THE BEST place ever in THE BEST way ever and if she could fall back upon them for more than a month in the next internship season.. and mom? mom went on to do .. what she thought was THE BEST for her,that time !! And shall we say now..All's well that ends well !! :)

The Silver Grey Dilemmas.

'Welcome to the world of un-innocence.No one has Breakfast at Tiffany's and Affairs to Remember.'

Welcome,indeed ladies and gentlemen,to the Generation of the Millenials or the
Generation Y (why??) , as some put it!

WELCOME BITCHES .. WelcomE to the CoolEst ShiAt eva..This is shiz dude,shiz as shiz can be!!Hop on the Globe.. *spank* * tequila shot* *spank* Cheers!! ;)

The era of the clear-cut.The era of the Black&White.The era of the Baby Boomers.The era of a visible line of distinction between the rights and wrongs of the world.The era of the Generation X..has officially ended.
As my Dad puts it, "The cult of Convenience" is here and is here to stay.The generation of the perpetually confused is multiplying at Godspeed.The mantra applicable universally is "Each to his own".
"Taking a stand" has become an obsolete-thing-of-the-yesteryears.And if someone talks like,ahem ahem,like THIS.. he/she is classified as the perfect conservative "prude" of the highest order..Oh-so-13th century!Oh-so-redundant!Oh-so-period! Oh-so-blah!oh-so-sad-oh-so-slow!Oh-so-Audrey Hepburn-Harlequin-Jane Austen.. Oh-SO-Ancient! Indeed, gone really are the days of the Knight in shining Armour,Everyone wants a Cold Vampire or a Hot Werewolf  in a Shiny Volvo and Trigonometry can kiss its own A(ngle)-S(ide)-S(ide)! Blah!!

But is this it? Is this the end of depth,sensibility,moral binding,smartness sans shrewdness,individuality,holding one's ground.. of Innocence? The end of White? The end of Black? Is THIS it?


Well,there is no big agenda behind writing this bit.Its just that i find myself face to face with these dilemmas more than often.And i realise that its not just me or people like me.Its everybody on some level or the other,for some subject or the other,over some issue or the other.Actually,the dilemmas i face are,trust me,   N-O-T-H-I-N-G in comparison to what i find my peers facing! They might be really big biz level corporate issues or really menial level>>whether the left or right profile-looks-good-in-the-display picture-sort of an issue..At the risqué of sounding excruciatingly grotesque in today's matrix-X-men-times,i'd say that i think the world's spinning so fast that its affecting the brain directly by muddling up all that it constitutes.

I'll speak,with strict disclaimer,only for myself and confess that i usually find myself questioning those things that i probably condemn or know that they aren't acceptable and that,which are (in my head!) unambiguous in my values or clear cut in my morality.But leaving all that aside,i still question,i still wonder.

It might be a simple question OR a very complex huge life changing decision...those dilemmas..of taking one drag from a friend's ciggie,of one drunken fling,one act of harmless flirting when in a relationship,of one cheat code,of one superiority ascertaining conversation with the person whose hung upon you to ensure his/her hung-up-ness,of one whiff of marijuana,of one night stand,of telling your family everything about yourself,of one seductive move,of one bribe,of one tiny lie or one big lie or lies nonetheless,monogamy,exclusivity in a non committal (but for all practical purposes!)relationship,of honesty,of hiding small lil things from your "friends" that are may be important to them but technically you aren't bound to disclose them,of one tiny secret experimental sojourn of the homosexual world,of passing on one piece of gossip with tactfully placing the words to add that extra spice to it,of getting into one insignificant compromising promise to get an advantage,of interpreting one confusingly funny and marginally mean comment made by a close guy friend as that being that of a sexist or that indicating menace,of having one live-in relationship,of misjudging or aptly judging feminism,of trusting,of loving,of feeling loved,of betrayal,of peace.. and the list never ends.White meets Black.Black meets White..to give birth to what the world calls .. Grey!

Everyone faces them.As i'd like to call them....The Dilemmas of the Grey.

Grey. is the new pink!! and..black,white,red,blue,green,beige,crimson,auburn,violet,turquoise..and what not!Its the colour of the generation.The colour of our state of minds.The colour of the fuzzy stuff,invisible lines and opaque judgments that our mind harbors.The colour that attches a question mark on everything as an automated response to anything by the brain.The colour that ensures that when we see the mirror we dont see our real selves but we see the doppleganger,the evil self with red horns instead of the halo,the etheral double only with a heart and mind which looks,well,grey! Grey,as sadly and bluntly as i may put it,has become the colour of our personality.We have lost track of our whites and our blacks,of our rights and our wrongs,of the line that distinguishes us from the others,of the things that matter to us from those that matter to the rest of the world,of what according to "me" is "me" from what according the "majority" is "me".

Is it all about being technically sound and (not)morally bound..??I mean all of us,do these things,that in our head are not "us" .. I mean in our heads we go.."aal izz well ", in my world everyone eats rainbows and poops butterflies,in my world i have my own take on everything and do whatever i feel is right,in my world i eat cool-sauce on epic-noodles with some Fawesome-bread on the side,in my world i am normal,in my world i'm comfortable in my skin,in my world i'm the leading lady/man of my own life. But in reality i might be a textaholic,a sarcasticoholic,a prudestitue(a prude by nature dressed as a prostitute as a result of a confused state of mind and no faith in herself!)or a hetroemo(a gay guy who is too shy or too scared to admit his sexual orientation because of the world's opinion off him!) a woo hoo girl or a Die-hard fan,with a million minute things crowding my mind because they were so minute that they weren't worth mentioning(or were too right or too wrong for the world)to be mentioned in the first place but as they added up..they became a huge pile of ..well,a million minute confusing difficult things.

It must have started with one weak,lame ,moron with absolutely no confidence in himself/herself.. who must've started imitating the world and aping what the others thought was "cool"..1 became 2..which became 4..and 4 went onto become a 4 million..and now we see confused people.. roaming about not knowing what they are doing and why they are doing it in the first place.
Hence,the plastic-filled-botox-injected-timeless-beauties.Hence,the steroid-stuffed-protein-fed-six packs.Hence,the brainless sameness.Hence,the blind superficiality!

But what next? I wonder what will be the new Grey? Is there anything beyond grey?do they even have a color on any palette after this?
Are we still better off than what lies ahead in store for us?

Don't know.
AND
Probably,don't want to know either!

Though what we do know is that may be its high time and we should just try,as much as we can,to at least get our whites and blacks straight, the hell out of  our own pile of grey stuff ! Just may be we should. :)

Mind over Matter OR Sensitivity over Sensibility: Its always a bittersweet symphony.

Paradoxically though it may seem, it is none the less true that life imitates art far more than art imitates life.

- Oscar Wilde

It was The Secret which was out in the open.Everything boiled down to science and was wrapped into three basic words "Law Of Attraction".Its no rocket science to understand what this is,its the same good ol' law which was applicable in the case of Adam and Eve,Eve and the apple,the magnets,freinds,like minded people,good food,good smell,lovers,pets..You name it.Life is what we make it..what we see it to be in our head..what we expect out of it,consciously or unconsciously..life's an exact replica of what we have attracted from the Universe into our lives,ourselves.Perception.is what makes or breaks it! Perception,my dear friend,is that one thing that makes all the difference.


Suddenly i see and i realise that all the big claims that i made to myself that i've matured,become practical and more in control of myself .. are all false. I haven't after all become all that wise or all that super human! I still suffer a lot from all my emotional outbursts and still cry over tiniest of things because i have linked it to a million other small things,made a mountain out of a molehill,muddled them all up.. and made myself miserable in the process! So its just that I find myself worrying and getting upset over one tiny thing growing to an excruciating level.But probably its not just me..May be its an underlying thins.May be its a thread running through us all.. Its a universal thing or atleast a national one as i see it. If one thing goes wrong,if the mood is not set right from the word go,if negative thoughts kick in when good thoughts are still putting their shoes on,if one tiny lil thing doesn't start at the correct note.. life automatically changes from Eastman Color to Black& White.. Rainbow looks all shades of black,blue and grey and hope takes a back seat in the dark dingy corner of a now, hopeless life!


On the personal front...


Today things flared up,when i saw the morning light along with the shattered pieces of my favorite-(now i think!)lucky-precious-most pretty pink mug.I had for years and needless to say,i was very very attached to it.Upset as i was,one thing led to the other,one molehill joined the other in my head and formed the utterly undesirable mountain only to give my upset-ness a whole new level!
The mind immediately jumped into the over thinking gear and I(unnecessarily)took the emotional high road!
I watched TV with absolute disinterest,switched over to reading and tried to understand what Jane Austen was saying only to find myself at stuck on that sad-upset-ness increasing chapter where Jane tries to tell herself that the love of her life did not ever love her and had left her.Brilliant! Now thats all that one needs when in such a quirky mood. NO,Really !Getting even more upset,i chucked the book and turned to the beloved world of internet for some solace.Only to have a friend(if i may say so?) pop up and try to normalize the strained and the awkward friendship we shared,making me all gooey,emotional and falling for the same familiar comfort all over again which i was trying to get out of.Bad timing,i decided was this person's "thing".VERY VERY bad timing.It was so typical to have popped out at that very moment!When everything looked gloomy,doomed,dark and twisty..all you need to do is..turn to your Fidus achates-Girl Friday,Confidant,Punching Bag,Right hand Person..oh what not!(who btw fyi,in this case is a veryy veryy successful-top notch-high profile-page three-sort-of-a-future Designer,who studies at the ace and one of the best,most cool,most posh design institute of the world!)So what is a girl in distress supposed to do? Call HER! And before its too late i must mention the most important thing about my Girl Friday,if i'm in a crisis like this,she,in all probability would have made sure to have landed herself in a huger,better,more complicated,more hyped,more imaginary,more important..and of course, a more URGENT crisis than mine.
So i call the lady of the hour and even before i begin with all my whining,cribbing,crying and complaining..she hits the overdrive and begins all the above before i could! There it was..End of story. The focus shifts,we engage ourselves in a discussion which we had almost daily regarding all our troubles(big in our heads!trivial and insignificant in the others'!) and finally just somehow, arguing, preaching , talking . we realise how we made the mountain out of a molehill.. how we thought thought and thought till the time the mind could take no more.And got ourselves into major ruckus before we even knew what was happening!The futility of the situation becomes crystal clear and I give up being the Queen of Pathetic-ville & Crib-Station..and come back to normal.


On the national level...


With the "dayan mehngai" engulfing everyone,with rajya sabha tickets up for sale,with commonwealth games' sites submerged in filthy waters,with grains going waste for the lack of storage,with a large chunk of people still dying of hunger,with another major chunk of people dying of the dangerous dengue,with abu salem coming out of jail never having looked better and healthier in his life,with Rakhi Sawant delivering insaaf,with thackerays blaming the north indians for bringing diseases to the maharashtrians,with the nuclear liability bill(wait,we did hear about THAT a lot lately,but does a commoner know what we have signed up for?? errmm.. nada!) being signed with the display of the highest level political drama,with all this and much more going topsy turvey..the torch bearers of our country seem to get just one thing right again and again and again like that is the most urgent and important issue of national importance to be dealt with..the hike in the salaries of the MPs! that as we see it today is one thing which needsno debates,gets only "aye-s" with 100% votes,makes the smoothest amendments and not to mention the obvious-quickest implementation!
One scandal after the other,one craziness to the other,corruption,deception,cheating,fraud,shams,scams..we look at a grim future and do the one thing which we should absolutely not,concentrate only on the gloomy story.Look at only the negatives and dont count our blessings.We dont get ourselves together and as a country stand up united and put pour foot down to do something about it.Rather we sit here,let one negative thought give birth to a thousand others,multiply exponentially and hope for anything BUT THE BEST.


May be its in our nature to do that,may be we are tuned in that fashion,may be we have become the ever crying,the ever cribbing,the ever whining nation. May be we dont realise this,but in reality,the country is after all a reflection on us,may be our approach in our personal life is our approach about everything and anything around us.We sit and curse the people running the show but none of us join hands and do basic things that can help run the show better,none of us do something,anything to set an example for everyone to see,learn and get inspired to do the same.We choose to take the easy way out,to go down the whining street,to curse and run down ourselves,to see only that,thats going wrong, to crib to the world about our unhappiness and discontentment with our lives,to bask in our sad situation,to show the world how we can not handle our issues and find solutions to our problems! We as a nation are allergic to the word "responsibility".Our national game isn't hockey,its the "blame game" And we just have one national character,as it sadly seems,"Corruption".
We're on our way to claim the fame as the Pathetic-ville & Crib-station of the world.We the people of India,have seemed to have solemnly pledged before God and this country,to take the country down the dumps and not do anything to get it back on track.WAIT.WHAT AM I DOING NOW?AM I NOT DOING EXACTLY THE SAME THING RIGHT ABOUT NOW.. ? No sir,I am not. I'm trying to drive home a point here.The point which has been stretched too far here is that,if at all we all want to do something and make a difference in a big way,if at all we do want to wake up from our deep slumber,we need to stop indulging in self pity on a daily basis,get it into routine and make it a habit to not sit and crib BUT to wake up and smell the coffee,take charge of our own lives and tackle the problem head on!


*******
All I'm saying is,we need to make our lives hassle-free,we need to nub the problem in its root,we need to stop it exactly where it starts, because its like a mad contagious disease.. its just like wild fire.. its just like the hottest-raunchiest-freshest piece of gossip.. you never know when it spreads so fast that it engulfs the world in it! I had my bestie to take care of that day(and many others like them!) but on a bigger note,for the bigger picture,on a larger thought..WHY HAVE SUCH DAYS IN THE FIRST PLACE?WHY NOT JUST BE HAPPY POSITIVE PEOPLE..MAKING A HAPPY POSITIVE COUNTRY?
Why see only Black blue and grey when the world is such a beautiful lovely magnificent palette ready for our consumption.. Perception.As i said,my dear friend makes,ALL. THE. DIFFERENCE . :)

Message in a Bottle.

"Choose between yesterday and tomorrow.Pick one.. And stick with it."

-Message in a Bottle.

The title is self explanatory,the characters are part real and part fictional and the love element in the story as it turns out,to the message writer's disappointment,is purely fictional! This blog delivers the story as it is.. and Why? Because its everyone's story and all of us who read this can take away something from it.. Its unaddressable like all the other messages in the bottle,simple,uncomplicated,heart whelming,often unnoticed,unadulterated and innocent.. here it is,as it is.. yet another.. Message. In a b(log). 


"Once upon a time in my life,when i didn't know too much,when i was a jumpy teenager,had my hormones all over the place and was just in grade 8..i thought i was big enough to feel the biggest emotion in the world..
LOVE.
I thought i felt all that Julia Roberts and Richard Gere,Shahrukh Khan and Kajol,Leonardo Di Caprio and Kate Winslet felt in all those dreamy larger than life movies,all that was depicted in those mills and boons,all that was ever said abt the sleepless nights and days spent in dreaming..and much more.

I associated all the weathers,all the songs,all things i could with him(basically.. everything i knew!) with him to a nauseatingly suffocating extent.only to have it all jam my memories and make it impossible for me to take it off my mind!every season and every whiff of air would bring with it one memory and become a constant reminder of him.not for one..two..three..or even 5 years..but for 10 long years..well the decade that i count for the fairytale i bred in my head is beginning from the day i officially declared war with myself for "love" and finally ending on the day,the one i thought i loved, snapped me outta my lala land and brought me back..crashing into reality.

10 and some more it was for me..the time for which i knew him. Or wait did i know him?well thats something..which i now confidently blame myself for.and i admit i didn't.ever.know him.

The things i learnt came very late for me in my illusionary relationship with him.apart from doing good to me by riding me off the burden of tellin myself that i liked him,he was the one who taught me to live in the real world and not in the world which i saw through my rosy glasses..

I did learn things i should've learned.and now when i look back i realise that they really were necessary for me to learn.i dont expect a fairytale anymore..no more prince charming sweeping me off my feet on the white horse.no more matching the glass slippers.no more kissing and comin back to life.no more perfection.no more larger than life world and no more dreams about living it..

But what he couldn't teach me was to be so practical and so insensitive that all that one oozes and draws is unhappiness.rather he strengthened my belief in karma,in the law of attraction and in believing in yourself.if i was wrong ever.i shall pay,repent n settle my score here before i go.and if i wasn't.then i'll get my due share of happiness here too. What went around in the past came around in the future for me,without fail.and i truly believe that it shall continue to happen till we all say our final goodbyes.its the way of life,like it or not,believe it or not,practice it or not.

'You showed me faith is not lost,I dont need wind to make me fly..miracles happen once in a while..when you believe.'

-Princess Diary

And damn right i do believe more than ever now that..i'm the leading lady of my life and i'm completely 'capable' to will things happen in my life! Its in my hands to make it or break it.To jazz it or mess it.To live it to leave it.So this is the last time i'm doing this Ancient-Mariner act and telling this tale,to myself and to the world,from hereon its a fresh start on a clean slate.. And i swear to have my happy ending!"

Woolie & Me

Woolie was my one n only pet and the best in the whole world.of whatever i remember,my first memories of him were those of him jumping onto us when we entered our main gate.i must've been too young to appreciate his jumpy demeanor so i used to get a lil scared when he used to do tht.barely able to walk i still used to strut around him n get followed everywhere by him in turn.i'm told he was stupid but loved me like hell.i was abt 6when he passed away.and how it stopped my world.i dont remember myself being much of a dog lover but i was always surrounded by dogs or people who owned dogs or in general loved dogs..cheeku,litchi,plum,kaju,buffy,rocky,ducky,charlie,tango,liza,chini,ozzy,simba,zorro,tommy aka sheru,roney,jerry,stephie are only a chosen few! Associations galore.. they are beyond doubt a part of the family.. at times more than that.. and some times.. all that there is to call family.

The reason i'm writing abt them today is because marley made me!marley from marley&me.yes,he made me miss my woolie n d fact tht i hardly got to spend anytime with him.i remember when he fell sick,he used to be taken to the hospital for check ups n stuff i always knew tht he was like me.like a child goin to d doc only to get better.fit as a fiddle.lil did i know tht woolie was getting old and it was becoming harder for him to fight.the day when i went to see woolie in the hospital is imprinted in my memory forever..probably the last time that i saw him..he was in the corner most ward of the veterinary hospital n was lookin so peaceful but tired in my mom's lap.she was pettin him n trying to feed him.i remember he came to me when i called him n i'm sure he managed a smile for me.i was way too young to realise tht he wouldn't be able to get better.way too lil too realise tht,that would be the last day when i'd be seeing my woolie.

Everybody in my house had had pets n knew the pain when they lost them.they had to put woolie to rest n when they told me he was never comin back,i was shattered like everyone else in the house.the kid who jus couldn't figure out how one could never return from a hospital i made my mother's life miserable by blaming her for giving him the injection tht killed him.i couldn't stop crying n missing him.days turned into months n months into years.
We never had a pet after him,it was too much of a hassle with me n my brother growing up.everyone had their hands full n couldn't take up d additional responsibility of a pet.but the truth,that i now see is that nobody could take his place.he was truly the one and only.atleast for me he was.and today i feel so bad,so so bad that i dont remember each n every tiny detail abt him,tht i was such a kid when i was with him.
I miss him.and it feels awful to not remember everything abt him.but one thing which was established beyond doubt for me was that,that woolie was family.

Woolie welcomed me home when i first came home,we both got scared when he saw a baby for the first time n i saw a dog for the first time when we saw each other,he looked out for me,guarded me n was most possessive abt me.today i miss seeing him around n regret not getting more time to spend with him.it makes me think of all those dogs tht have in some way touched my life.i just hope wherever they are,they're kicking it n living it up.
He will always be my one n only.my woolie.
For how much so ever time they might stay with you,they do become ur lifeline.

So i'm sure ure lookin at me Woolie from somewhere up there,wagging ur tail and still lookin out for me.you were n always will be family.this one's for all those pets who remind me of you n make me miss you even more.this one's for woolie.only for you.

Silver Closet

As i write i realise that those of you who know me,would realise at once that its me.And those of you who don't,i'd like to see what a stranger would think off a person like me.

There is no hidden agenda behind writing under a pen name(Well,to put it straight on record,i dont have a pen name and if i did it would'nt definitely be this!)This name however has its own significance in my life and its grown on me for a different reason so,a few years ago, when i had to make a profile and not put down my real name,i used it to make this blogger profile just for fun. Age .Probably makes you do stupid stuff without any apparent reason.

However,today when i have finally gotten down to blogging,i feel attached to my profile as it brings back several memories of some very very unforgettable days in my life and for the same reason i'd cling on to my same old profile.Put some more mystery in there,make it a lil more interesting by revealing and not revealing at the same time.The information,that is!

Silver Potpourri is my identity and my state of mind all rolled into two words.

Silver Closet will give you a sneak peak into my life.Its nothing big,nothing fancy or nothing extraordinary about it. But each closet of same things cane be made special if arranged in a different permutation and combination.

You've already been warned about the human nature of the blog.Expect the unexpected.Subject to mood swings.Terrible and inexplicable at times.Random some times. Compulsively confessional at times.Very random the other times.Occasional Emotional Bursts.Very unconnected.Imaginary and dreamy.Very repetitive a times.And not to forget,Completely Unplanned!

So,this being the first edition of Silver Potpourri,i'm going to live up to its name and give you three posts,off the top of my head..

1.Give you a preview of the things that make me up..

2.Dedicate the next post to "a man's best friend".The dog of my life!

3.Tell you a tale with lessons of all flavors ..A tale of The beauty and the beast.A tale of two cities.A tale of Persuasion.At tale of Losing the battle but winning the war.A tale of Everyone worth knowing.A tale ..Gone with the wind.

So,step one..Letting you in,into my closet..now..

• I am a strict follower of the Do good to get good school of thought.Because there is nothing like a guilt free and hassel free life.
• If i could,i'd leave everything and go all around the world learning different dance forms.I really would.
• My family,was,is and always will be top priority for me.
• I find Pirates of the Caribbean,the movies very very inspiring,there's a fearless streak in them which just dazzles out to me. Don't ask me how!
• I prefer white sauce over red for my pasta.
• I'm the biggest fan of YELLOW BULBS in the whole wide world!if i could i'd ban all the tubelights of the world or break them.
• If ever a movie has been made with Julia Roberts,Hugh Grant,Shahrukh Khan,Aamir Khan,Richard Gere in it..then 9.99/10 times i've loved it.
• I am your typical out of the book sort of a girl. There is not one symptom that i dont show!I love girly pink stuff! :) Except.. i cant stand whinny-overbearing-screaming for attention-nauseatingly sweet-or excessively bitchy- girls.(this,because some morons associate these qualities with the definition.NO sir/madam,this does not come within the definition.)
• I can't stand hypocrites and non committal people.
• I though it'd never happen and i would never let it happen,but 2 winters back.. i changed from being a winter hating/loathing/abhorring to a winter loving person.Things do change.
• Money isn't everything and according to me too much of it is always a liability. I want enough to maintain my lifestyle,increase the standards enough to be able to enjoy what i have..
• I'm a voracious reader..anything and everything.. depending upon the mood at that time.
• I'm a patriot through and through.i still choke atleast once while singing the national anthem i still feel elated when i go out in the world and declare that i am an Indian and i feel like committing genocide when i see corrupt people ruining their own country's name.
• I loathe any sort of bad smell!!ANY..Bad breath,body odour,bad rotten stuff smell..u name it!:(
• Hygiene..in all forms and in all manners is absolutely most important.Its more like an Obsessive Compulsive Disorder with me.
• "Sheesha ho ya dil ho" yes,the song. generates a physical reaction in me. And God knows i puked twice or thrice as a kid when it started playing.And for some strange reason off late"Summer of 69" makes me wanna hit the person playing it hard in his /her face!(P.S: I still love u Bryan!)
• I get attached to things,places and people with the bat of an eyelid!And when i do,i can't dissociate easily.
• Infidelity is a crime.Period.
• My definition of hot has oodles of intelligence,dollops of wit,a naturally courteous behavior,a dash of gentleness and no hint of being a sexist! looks don't matter that much.. but good looks never hurt anyone!Still if I had to list my absolute essentials in a guy..they'd be..
  1. A heart of gold, a balanced beautiful head,held high,on strong responsible shoulders and feet grounded firmly on the ground.
  2. Absolute squeaky cleanliness.. From clean cut nails, to clean ears and freshly ironed nice smelling clothes n shoes..The works!!
  3. A brilliant sense of humor.
  4. And the unforgettable smell of a good aftershave/cologne/perfume and the likes!:P
  
• AND if you insist on asking me for specifications on looks- tall, bearded, man-binned (!), with forearms to die for and artistic fingers, clean toe nails and a smile that melts me like a load of wax on fire. (Remember never to ask me anything ever again on this subject. TMI already!)
• I would love to live by the sea and also in the countryside with a view of the hills, sometime in my life.


• Also, did i mention keeping an assortment of puppies is one of dreams? yes. someday i will!

So sneak peak delivered..Check. Item No.1 :)

More to follow later and more things to pop out of the closet some other time.. but for now...here's signing off the first post..

No.2 & 3  on the check list to follow soon.

Much love.. (whoever's reading!)

Sea