The Times of The Capital – First Edition.

As i write this, I realise that I've hardly had 2 spoonfuls of what life has to offer..  And I'm acutely aware of the fact that I have a long way to go till I reach the bottom of my cup. 

The Capital has been very kind and God has been kinder.

I’ve known The Capital and its system ever since I was a child. So it lets me slip into my comfort zone with ease. But at the same time, it does have its drawbacks, which are not small, to state the least. I had some notions about myself before I shifted base from my own Shangri-La to this city where this Shangri-La isn’t mine. (It’s Eros’! Hah LAME.) On a serious note, I knew the hardships I’d face and the smooth sailing that would follow. What I didn’t know was how I was going to take them. My perception of my behavior has turned out to be quite different from my behavior itself.

I thought I was patient.

NOT. I’m quite un-patient. And that is a trait that I’ve acquired in this city. Someone once said that, patience is not the art of waiting for something that you want, it’s an attitude that one exhibits during that time, waiting for things to go his/her way. It’s basically your reaction to that time and its events. My response- I get agitated, paranoid, uneasy, clammy, upset, and teary - all at the same time within a span of a few minutes. An event that doesn’t go as it should when I am out of the confines of my lovely home (Thank Heavens for that!), it takes me hardly any time to lose my cool. And lose my cool in a way that meticulously doesn’t show on the exterior but boils like some complex chemical broth on the interior. I will attribute this to the safety concern that keeps you on guard 24*7 and leaves no room for a breather in that respect. Which brings us to what I’ve developed as a result of that stress – Acute never-ending ACIDITY. Hello Digene!

I thought I had courage.

Ermm. I still am courageous. On the outside, that is. Why, I squarely faced the Beggar family –squad at Khan Market,at night, all alone! I rode with the most ferocious looking auto fellas. I work at a place with a slimy person to take orders from. I also went into some very immodest sort of houses with never to be trusted-brokers while house hunting. I also took a cab to the airport, from TaxiSure, one of the lesser known cab services with the shadiest looking, English speaking, fancy named-cabbie, at three at night. On the inside, I have cursed myself and thanked my stars a gazillion times for each and every event that I’ve mentioned here and for more such events- some avoidable and some absolutely inevitable!

I thought I was going to be Independent.

NADA. A BIG NO NO.

Strictly speaking, independence is a notion, defined in a very skewed fashion. The one and only Oxford Dictionary declares that:

Independent means: adjective

·              1free from outside control; not subject to another’s authority.

·              2not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence:

·              3capable of thinking or acting for oneself.

·              4not connected with another or with each other; separate.

I thought I qualified atleast 2 out of the given 4 options to be independent. When in all actual-ness, I score a big zero on four! There is no doubting Number 1. I am ONLY subject to “another’s authority” a minimum of 90% of the time, which constitutes all work hours and also some hours after.
Number 2 is thankfully taken care off in bits by the self and the rest is ensured by the familia, rather lavishly. Number 3. IS A JOKE! Which I have come to terms with now. The butt of this is usually my mother, my aunt and my soul sister. I need constant advice on what to do, where to go, who to meet, how much to divulge (Ye apni Raajdhaani hai bhaisaab! Patri nahin kholni hai kisi ke bhi saamne!)...blahblahblah. Number 4 is not true for anyone. In our times of social networking, connectivity is a necessity.. Or an obsessive compulsive disorder  ...Or an inevitable consequence of technology. Have atleast a cellphone? You will be connected. I for one, am thankful that I’m super connected, to whoever that matters.

So there goes the Independence. Of thought, mind and Soul. The Capital doesn’t provide you with liberation, sorry. You got to fight for it or go someplace deeper within yourself. For which, there is such a thing as Art of Living. Another one which I thought I had mastered. But, not even close.

I am in reality, very dependent- with a parasitic intensity! Dependent on my most vital carriers for the food for the soul, all of whom live hundreds of miles away.

What has this city given me then?

It’s giving me the teachings to last a lifetime. It’s grinding my posterior to no limits. Its giving me some *good* parties. It’s giving me my friends. It’s given me a beautiful cozy house that I can call mine; truly, because it feels like it’s mine. It’s showing me what it is to live in a whirlwind. One step at a time.

There’s work. There’s the managing of the house. There’s the socializing. There’s the shopping – all sorts at that! There’s the easy access to art events. There’s the crowd. There’s the drive on the broad beautiful roads. There’s the best Dal Bukhara and Tiramisu. There’s the quiet when you need it. There’s the magnificent sight of the breathtaking monuments. There’s the revelation. There’s the burst of flowers. There’s that realization. There’s the always visible somewhere, standing tall - My National Flag. There’s that assurance. There’s that patriotism in the air. There’s the non- stop and the best Radio with the most number of stations in the country. There’s that extreme weather. There’s the confluence of the who’s who and the nobodies from all over the globe.. all right here !

Oh and well…Somewhere in there is also..

… the Patience.

… the Courage.

… the Independence.

To my tried & tested times as well as my testing times here, for now and for all the times to come... Cheers to you Dear Capital! Keep my Safety net intact J ThankyouverymuchJee  !!